STORY TIME| I think I crushed my crush

Posted on by omobim1 in PERSONAL, RELATIONSHIP

“Let me just say there is no room for pretence here,” was what my friend said as he asked me who was my crush while eating dinner in my living room on a hot🔥 Sunday evening. 

I had a smile on my face as I repositioned myself to think about the question carefully. Not just because no guy had ever asked me that before, but also at that moment I wasn’t expecting those words from him. He was a serious nerdy, bibliophile, and churchy kind of person. 
“Is this a trap?” I asked myself. 

I wasn’t certain, but I knew at that moment I was in dilemma, placed at a corner I couldn’t escape from. It was like being between the devil and the deep blue sea.

I am certain that some of you can correctly guess my facial expressions and my next words at this moment. I was literally in shock and wonderstrucked that I didn’t realize when I started mumbling things like, “ehhh…mmm…my crushhh? hmm… you mean my crushhh? …ehh…Ok…I am not sure I have one.” As I finally started saying something coherent. “But if I give it a thought, maybe one might pop up”. That was all I could come up with. 

I have never seen him laugh so hard like he did that day.

Finally, I regained my composure and confidently said, “none, I had one before but I got over him.”

“Overtime, I stopped giving room for crushes, because I hate the windows of hope shutting down in my face and getting my feelings all up for nothing.” I continued.

“So true,” he replied hastily. 

Now suspicious of him, I silently asked with almost a whispering voice, “do you by any chance have a crush on someone I know?”

“Oh yes, I actually do, but I am not sure she feels the same way and yes, you do know her.” He replied. 

At this point, most of you would probably have gotten the gist, but my innocent self had no clue. Out of curiosity I asked, “Who is she? Maybe I can tell you if she does.” Hahaha, I can’t believe myself also. 

“It’s you Debby, but don’t freak out.” He muttered.

My jaw dropped, couldn’t even put the morsel of swallow in my wide opened mouth, my hand just got stucked in the air. “Oh no, I don’t feel the same way, what do I do now?” I asked myself yet again.

Trying to prevent anything that would ruin our friendship, I said, “don’t worry about it, we are still friends, let’s just talk about something more interesting.”

From his facial expressions, I realized I might just have rekindled the blazing inferno.

“So, you don’t care about my emotions at all even to at least discuss it? Wow, for one second I thought maybe you might feel the same way if you knew. You can at least pretend you care. I am leaving, thanks for the dinner.” He said as he packed his plates and moved towards the kitchen. 

Still confused about the whole scenario going on, I dropped my morsel back into my plate and rushed after him. 

“I am sincerely sorry, I didn’t mean to hurt your feelings, it’s just that I don’t feel the same way. We are just friends and I would like it to remain same. I didn’t want to break your heart by telling you my true feelings. That’s why I wanted to switch topic.” I explained calmly.

As he approached the front door to exit my house, he said, “Well, either ways my heart still feels like it has just been ripped out of my chest, because I wanted to be more than just a friend.”

I played and replayed the scene over and over again and it still feels like it’s all a dream. Everything happened so fast. How did a nice dinner conversation turn into a chaotic, disastrous goodbyes. 
I think I have crushed my crush. 

To be continued!

Look out for HOW TO AVOID CRUSHING A CRUSH!

If you were in my shoes is there anything you think you would have done differently within a twinkle of an eye?

Lots of Love.

Pic credit; Google images

Published by omobim1

My friends call me debby and I am unique in my own way, I love to be creative with anything and everything, a medical doctor by profession, fun to be with, and recently started exploring new things including this.

41 thoughts on “STORY TIME| I think I crushed my crush”

  1. Whoa, this is tragic. I have been in the guy’s shoes and it definitely built a big bridge between the relationship I had with the guy. But I love this statement by you, “Overtime, I stopped giving room for crushes, because I hate the windows of hope shutting down in my face and getting my feelings all up for nothing”. It’s powerful.
    However, for your question it requires more thought. When I come to an instant whereby I think I have that the write answer I will repost on here.
    Thanks for all these amazing informations that you share.

    Liked by 2 people

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    1. Ohhhhhhh @queen, first, let me apologize on the guy’s behalf, I am sure to some extent he won’t have deliberately meant to hurt you. And maybe a different approach would have made things different.

      Just like what went wrong here, I was caught unaware, it happened all fast, my brain didn’t have time to process but my mouth was moving.
      It was my intention to keep the friendship going but I made it end sort of, it wasn’t planned.

      As for the “overtime” part, I had to, I know it kills the fun of it but if you re someone like me that takes everything kinda seriously then you just want to keep off.

      No problem, feel free post your answer any time

      Finally, thank you for always reading my piece and commenting, it puts a smile on my face. 💘💘

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  2. Wow! it’s always very hard when we don’t feel the same way to someone who values us in a different way than we want them to. or even the other way around! I’ve recently, well actually not so recently but for the last year had a crush on someone and decided to just tell him. I never actually spoken to him before i only knew him from his gigs so i sent him a nice message telling that i liked him. The guy was really sweet, he told me he’d love to have dinner with me. We went out, everything was so perfect he was really nice and assuring me that everything was going well and telling ma at the end how surprised he was that we really got along together. however when he dropped me off my house I never heard from him. I tried to talk to him a week later, I was very friendly, honest and told him that if he didn’t like me we can just be friends it doesn’t have to be weird between us. He said we have to hang out many more times to get to know each other better so let’s hang out more. My innocent me believed that and I waited for the next call which never came. Around 2 weeks later he was already seeing someone else! you can imagine how hard that was! It would’ve hurt a little if he had said maybe something like he’s not thinking of being with someone now so let’s just be friends instead of giving me hope and making me feel like I was an option in case the other girl didn’t work out!
    I think the worst thing anyone can do is try to be nice to someone who likes them by changing the subject or ignoring their feelings or just pretending that they are busy. We are all guilty of this but after my experience I realised that you should be straight with someone. you can always let someone know that you don’t ike them back in a nice way. We are all mature enough to understand that foe someone to like us back is a 100% up to them when we give them and show them all we got. so if doesn’t work it means they want something else and they are not the one for us. if they just sit with us and explain that we will feel a lot better about ourselves than thinking “I am not good enough or no body will ever like me” the important thing is to let someone know that they are good enough but they are on a different wave which may not make the two right for each other.
    I hope this was a good answer! I am going to write about my experience soon. I’m just waiting until the effect wears off so that I can write with a clear heart rather than a hurt one!

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    1. Woow, It must really hurt a lot for people on the other side, until we are in that shoes maybe understanding the way it feels might just be a little difficult, putting the words out there is easy, trying to pretend it didn’t happen is even easier and not saying “no” so we don’t hurt their feelings is the easiest but we just end up hurting the people more than we can imagine.
      I have learnt a lot from your experience more than you can think of and mine has made me realize a lot also which I will be sharing next week.

      Yah, I agree with you on definitely sharing this on your blog when you hurt less, it will help people one way or the other.

      Thank you so much sue for sharing this with me or rather “us”. I appreciate.

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    1. Hi Deshi, how are you doing? Pardon my behaviour, it’s been a while and maturity has made things more clearer and I would take a different approach if that happens now. But yah I agree with you, he just left and that put a strain on our relationship but I can’t blame him either, like I said it all happened quickly. Next week I will be sharing “how not to crush your crush” through experience.

      Most of all, thank you for reading and commenting..enjoy your weekend! ❤

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  4. From experience, I must say, its one of the worst feeling on earth to be rejected, esp by the person you genuinely love. But one thing life has thought me is that, we mustn’t get all that we desire.
    The young man has every reason to feel dejected, anguished, sad and alone. But being upset is way out of it. Though your first approach wasn’t the best.
    We cannot get upset just because someone do not think in the same direction as we do. I have been rejected quite a few times, but the ones that hurt me to my bones was that of the two ladies I genuinely loved. But that didn’t make me to hate them or stop talking with them. As a matter of fact I am still close to both of them up till this day. It takes maturity to know and understand that though you found the qualities and attributes u are looking for in her, maybe she didn’t find the same in u. That shouldn’t make u upset. Just have to dust yourself and forge ahead. But I still have to admit that it is not so easy. In fact it has been the most miserable days I have had in life.
    But I see it as avenue for mental resolve. As a matter of fact, immediately after being rejected, different thoughts starts flowing into your head, ” maybe I am not good enough, maybe I am too ugly, maybe I am boring, what if I can’t find love, what if I am destined to suffer like this… e.t.c.” And men fell that this kind of feelings is solely for them only.
    But let’s switch the person here. Remember those ladies that have been making advances on you, that you ignored or some that had even summoned courage to even tell you how they felt, that you rejected.
    For me, some ladies had and still making advances on me, that I diplomatically avoided. And few had told me boldly to my face that they have crush on me. In either case I turned down their advances.
    Though nature and culture made it that men should be the one making the move, so most men feel like they are in this alone. But, that’s not the case. Most women die in silent on their crush, because of the stereotype that women advances might bring. Ladies will be thinking, if I approach him, “he do think that I am desperate and too cheap, and won’t value me”. Sadly, that’s what most of the guys think. I have talked with my fellow guys on this subject matter, and sadly, most will tell you that they most likely won’t accept a proposal of friendship from a girl, and even if they accept, most likely it will be on fletting bases.
    So if we set the statistics on the number of approach per likelihood of been rejected, we will find out that more women are rejected than men.
    The whole thing boils down on the manner in which the unpleasant explanation on how things won’t work out is divulged.
    It has to be done respectfully, taking into consideration of the other person’s feelings. And the person crushing shouldn’t take it as an act of betrayal, but rather should feel proud of how brave he/she is to let their feelings known.
    I know I have written a lot, and don’t even know whether I am still making sense…Lolsss
    But all the same very interactive blog and educating for the pple to learn And deal with this kind of situations.

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    1. You made a lot of sense, I am overloaded! Thank you kaycee for this awesome contribution of yours, maturity is really needed in this kind of case.
      I agree with your statistics also.
      I have gotten more insight with your experience, thanks for sharing this with us.
      I really appreciate the effort of commenting, it means a lot..thank you!❤

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  5. Well, I was in a similar situation once. He freaked out, too. So much that he stopped talking to me for half a year. I think it’s the psychology of rejection.

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    1. Hey girl! It’s been a while, hope you are doing good?
      I agree with you, there must be an immediate impulse and brain stimulation to react a certain way each someone is rejected.
      Why freak out, I am sure you knew it could go two ways, yes or no, prepare your mind for either situation. So when u get rejected you wouldn’t freak out but rather you would handle it with maturity to keep your friendship, you don’t want to lose a good friend because you couldn’t control your emotions.

      Thanks for reading and commenting dear.. enjoy your weekend

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      1. I’m doing well, I was happy to see your post in my reader! Maybe they feel embarassed or something. But idk, it’s better to face reality and move on rather than keep hoping and get disappointed after all…

        Liked by 1 person

      2. Good to know you are doing well!
        I quite agree, Maybe they are.
        True, disappointment has a way it could break you especially if you have waited too look for it.

        Liked by 1 person

      4. Actually the experience wasn’t recently just wanted to share it here.

        I am doing good dear, everything is working out for my good. The internship is going smoothly so far.

        Liked by 1 person

    1. Thanks Dave, I hope am right? Actually I am not sure at that point bringing his emotions out would have helped cos I really didn’t see us becoming a thing.
      Maybe if there was a little thing to explore I would have allowed it I can’t really say.
      Thanks for reading and commenting, was just checking out your piece and you’ve got quite a lot of GOOD stuffs.

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      1. I am not Dave 😊

        It’s alright, it’s difficult to make a decision I must say!

        Thanks for your appreciation, seriously I just write for the purpose to take my head low. Else I don’t find it that’s entertaining or well written like yours!

        Liked by 1 person

      2. Ohhhhhhh, I sincerely apologize, I must have gotten it wrong, because I saw the name on your piece, I assumed it was your. So what’s the real name if it’s not a secret?

        Yah, decision like that needs more than a twinkle of an eye…

        Oh thank you so much.

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    1. Thanks Christy B! I know it might have hurt at that moment but I didn’t even get the chance to think it all through. Yah I agree, it heals after a while. I appreciate you reading my piece dear.

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  11. Pingback: CHECK OUT HOW TO AVOID CRUSHING YOUR CRUSH – OMOBIM1

  12. What you did is what I will do as well. I don’t know how to pretend or lead anyone on. Setting things straight was the best thing you did. He may be pissed now, but surely he will come to appreciate you someday believe me. This is a great post and I love it. Thank you for sharing with us.

    Liked by 1 person

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    1. You’re most welcome Whitney!
      I hope he really see it this way later.
      I am glad you loved it, thanks for reading and commenting on my pieces.. much 💘

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